The [Ninja Turtles] henchmen Bebop and Rocksteady have hijacked the musical genres for us just like the Lone Ranger hijacked the William Tell Overture for our parents.

- xkcd

Thursday, March 30, 2006

We Are All Immigrants (Forever)

How many times to people have to have the concept of immigration and assimilation explained to them. I can't believe that I have to spend 5% of my life reminding people that we were all immigrants at one point. At one point Irish and Italians were looked down upon. At another Japanese and Chinese immigrants. And now it is Mexicans in particular and Latinos in general. What the hell?

Have the last 300 years shown absolutely goddamned nothing? Let's take Chinese immigration as a simple example. Here's a pamphlet published in 1902:
Effects of the Geary Act.

The effects of Chinese exclusion have been most advantageous to the State. The 75,000 Chinese residents of California in 1880 have been reduced, according to the last census, to 45,000; and whereas the settlement of California by Caucasians had been arrested prior to the adoption of these laws, a healthy growth of the State in population has marked the progress of recent years. Every material interest of the State has advanced, and prosperity has been our portion. Were the restriction laws relaxed we are convinced that our working population would be displaced, and the noble structure of our State, the creation of American ideas and industry, would be imperiled, if not destroyed. The lapse of time has only confirmed your memorialists in their conviction, from their knowledge derived from actually coming in contact with the Chinese, that they are a nonassimilative race, and by every standard of thought, undesirable as citizens. Although they have been frequently employed and treated with decent consideration ever since the enactment of the exclusion law in 1882, which was the culmination and satisfaction of California’s patriotic purpose, they have not in any sense altered their racial characteristics, and have not, socially or otherwise, assimilated with our people.
1902 American Federation of Labor (AFL) Pamphlet

The Chinatown in San Francisco still exists. However, can anyone argue that Chinese immigrants have not integrated into the community? The Chinese immigrant population, like every other immigrant population, started out localized to a few areas and over the course of two to three generations it slowly broadens out into a culture that is broadly integrated with American society in general. Sure, they celebrate Chinese New Year in the spring but Catholics have to cross themselves all the time and which of those is more bewildering to me on a daily basis?

Do you want to live in a world without Chinese food? I hope not. Can we survive a world without Mexican food? Highly unlikely. Burritos are an essential component of my life as are tacos, mole sauce, tamales, and sopapillas.

I want one concrete example of someone who was laid off for an illegal immigrant. You were denied the chance to be a busboy? Your lifelong dream of cross-country truck driving? What, exactly? Mexicans might live in their own neighborhoods right now but soon, very soon, they will be just another part of American society. In all honesty, you can spend the next fifty years of your life muttering quietly about shifty Mexicans or you can be glad there is finally someone who can teach you how to make decent tacos.

They Might Be Giants said it rather catchily,
This is where the party ends
I can't stand here listening to you
And your racist friend
I know politics bore you
But I feel like a hypocrite talking to you
And your racist friend

And finally, enjoy a crazy punk cover mp3 here (by Australian pop-punk band Bodyjar) courtesy this TMBG fanblog.

Tonight's Music Schedule

Hard Fi and French Toast tonight at 830 at the Black Cat in DC. Suck it, westie bitches!

I'll give you one hell of a concert report in a few hours! It will kill you because it will rock so hard. Especially since I have no idea what terms like 'wall of sound' and 'arrangements' mean in the musical sense. Of course, my good buddy Context has pretty much got all this figured out, but, yet, I have no context for what constitutes a good one of either.

It is most likely that I will post some bullshit about my opinions of the show!*

Eat Me, Cobagz.

*Incidentally, isn't that pretty all everything previously posted on music?

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Bite ME.

Since everyone else is getting some, why not.

Monday, March 27, 2006

In which I refute Chuckles by posting further musical adventures

We are still without pictures due to this particular camera's technological peculiarities and my own inability to organize anything besides entertainment media. However, I want to make sure and keep Hope Chest's name in the limelight so that I can achieve my lifelong goal of being personally thanked in the liner notes of an album.

So, now that you know my blatant partisan bias (i'm no Althouse), you can take the following review with the appropriate grain of salt1.

Hope Chest were the openers and they did an excellent job. They did lack keyboards this go around and I forgot to ask why. They did their first three songs without a rhythm section which was neat but it did expose their biggest weakness which is getting Ray and Vera in tune together. They got their about halfway through the set but the first few songs their were moments that were not quite together. This was more noticeable without many other sounds to fill in around it. I did hear a lot of complaints from the other bands about the monitors and I can guess that did not help the situation.

After the initial songs, they added the rhythm section and they filled up the sound to their more stereotypically dream-pop sound. I love the song "October" and I really liked the new, to me at least, song "Your Huckleberry Friend." I liked the sound a lot better here than at Kimo's as well. I do like Vera's voice and thought that once she got more settled into the set she did a good job. She seemed a little lost at times though without a keyboard to occupy her. I heard whispered musings about a Canadian tour so hopefully there will be a chance to see a few more gigs before that.

The second band, Sianspheric, was louder. The crude description I came up with to describe them was that they sound like Radiohead without the interesting electric effects. Big wall of sound™ chords with singing that definitely got the shaft,i.e.. was completely indecipherable, courtesy of the Castle's sound system. They wereserviceablee but not quite overwhelming. Also, their existential dread of the 50 hour drive through the empty middle of America might have contributed to a somewhat melancholy performance. Who knows? Overall it was an enjoyable set but I didn't rush over to the merch table.

A Northern Chorus headlined the set and they were a little more conventionally unconventional. By this, I mean that they had your traditional rock band and then added the female lead who played cello and trumpet. Here again we were stymied by the sonic limitations and I could rarely pick out the cello from underneath the guitars. At any rate, they were fairly polished and I did enjoy their set. They played more fuzzed out songs and I wish they had done more with the trumpet because I thought it punched up a little more contrast with the whole process. Of course, I am also and always a sucker for instruments so I don't know that everyone would agree with me on that.

I will try and getpicturess up soon but I never seem to have the computer and camera in the same place. If that fails I will try and get The Strokes review up shortly.

Oh, one further unnecessary swipe at our dear friend Pinko Punkass, since I am "objectively made out of money" on my massive salary (approximately equal to a post doc's) I would certainly have spotted one entrance fee and quite likely even have bought one girly well drink so that you would temporarily quell the unceasing river of bull!® that otherwise flows.

In Which I Take Exception To, um, Me

Friends are really neat. They help you move. They help you meet girls (or guys). They help you get over the girls (or guys) they helped you meet. Friends help you stay fit. They razz you when you are being a poncy bastard. They rip you when you are being stupid. They flame you on your blog. That is just what freinds do for you. They keep you grounded while cheering you. So, fulsome, baby, sweetie, see you tonight? Same time, same place? Kisses!

Friday, March 24, 2006

In Which I Take Exception To fulsome

How well rounded can you be if all you ever post about is music?

Thursday, March 23, 2006

In which I take exception to the Uncanny Canadian

So, some people love the "old" Belle & Sebastian. Don't get me wrong, I liked them just fine. However, this new incarnation of them is awesome. Simply, unqualified, awesome.

I want to try and capitalize on some of the review trends that Pop Renaisance (PR) seemed to enjoy previously. I thought Belle and Sebastian (B&S) were stellar. To see Stuart come out and be a traditional frontman was a lot of fun. To see him, and by extension the band, I thought B&S managed to have a fairly cohesive sound throughout their set while exploring avenues that I did not traditionally consider B&S territory. Luckily, I like the new album and your feelings towards "The Life Prsuit" will presumably mimic your feelings toward the show. Personally, after PR gave a pre-release preview, I played "Song for Sunshine" every day for two weeks. Happily, they played this song at the show.

Personally, I feel like B&S had a better set than the New Pornographers (NP). There are two main reasons for this. The first is the fact that I think B&S has a more varied repetoire. I love NP but there are times when I think all of their songs sound a little too much the same (especially without Bejar). The NP did perform a few Bejar songs without his presence and, yes, the drumer did sing. I know I'm in the minority here but I think I like his songs the best. This is not to say that NP put on a bad show. It was excellent and I was bouncy and I was hoping for some sympathetic energy from the Bulls! but it was clearly not to be since I got GC, the Bullette(?). They closed with "Sing Me Spanish Techno" and I don't know what they opened with because when we got to the venue at 8:05pm (show listed as starting at 8pm) they were already playing but that's another rant for another time.

Anyways, there's more but I'll stop to preclude poetry since I'm already too late for banal internet quizzes which, much like humorous forwards, have clearly outlived their actual humor providing potential.


You are Larry Koffi.  You are director in charge auditing and collecting Union Togolaise De Banque Lome, Togo West Africa.  You came across $44.5 million of a dead person in your bank. You will give me 25% to be his NEXT OF KIN.  You like red jelly beans.

Which Nigerian spammer are You?

Poetry coming up next!

UPDATE by fulsome: Screw this. Poetry will be deleted.

Friday, March 17, 2006

Enough is Enough! I've Had It With All These Snakes.

I went to see V for Vendetta at a 10 PM showing last night. They had a couple new trailers, one for 3Fast 3Furious: The Furiosity is Fasting and another one for Poseiden (with Richard "I was in freaking Jaws!" Dreyfuss sporting some serious diamond earing action).

One trailer they didn't have though, the kickass new Snakes on a Plane trailer. There's a YouTube video of it but it's nowhere near as good of quality as this one here.

All I can say is that this movie looks awesome. And that V for Vendetta is pretty good, it's just missing that something that would have made it great.

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Guess who has Lollapalooza tickets?!?

Not much of a guess. I do!

Anyone up for Coachella? Long live rock'n'roll!

OK, now I must impress people so that my company does not go bankrupt.

Bitch about what a sell-out Lollapalooza is in the comments.

Monday, March 13, 2006


I was coming back here to post some totally angsty lame poetry about the best hamburger ever and how it left me years ago. Then I got here and there were posts. Damn. It.

Anyway, everyone should be familiar with this man's work. Especially, Get Your War On. If you aren't than you aren't cool. Since I am the sole judge of cool, I know.

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Fulsome Concert Calendar (intended)

Any show listed without tickets is, of course, provisional. If anyone else has any interest in going let's make it official. I just lost Frank Black tickets because I was waiting for final word from Punko and instead now get nothing.

So here's the list with links to any potential non-obvious headliners that are more obscure than usual, the rest you can look up and feel as unhip as appropriate.

March 16 - Citay, Sic Alps @ Hemlock

March 19 - Field Music, Okay, Red Thread @ BotH
March 20 - Art Brut, Gil Mantera's Party Dream, Crystal Skulls @ BotH

March 21 - Belle and Sebastian, The New Pornorgaphers (happily Pop Ren is coming with me and tix are secured!)

March 22 - The White Rose Movement, Bella Vista, Sky Parade @ BotH

March 23 - Hope Chest @ Edinburgh Castle

March 24 - The Strokes (I have purchased tix and have two extra!)

March 27 - The Subways, The Shys, Two Seconds @ Slims (tix are $2 with service charge, no excuses people!)

March 28+29 - The Bad Plus @ Yoshi's in Oakland -- these guys are phenomenal jazz musicians who play some rock covers (Blondie, Nirvana, Black Sabbath, Bjork) plus their own phenomenal tunes.

Catching Up: The Capes Concert Relived for Others in a Hopefully Pleasing Fashion

I went and saw The Capes last week at The Independent. I was waiting for some digital pictures to get uploaded but as that looks to be at least 72 hours away I will go ahead and put up my take now and provide pictures later.

The opening act was The Drop. They're from LA and I can't seem to find any internet documentation of their existence. They were surprisingly tight for the first of three bands. The music was pretty bland, like something you might expect to hear on the Alice™ radio stations, but they had a good sound and were actually pretty tight. So it was not unpleasant.

The next band was actually the biggest draw for the evening. They are SF up-and-comers The Love X Nowhere. I have to say I was actually moderately disappointed with them. They do indeed have
A big lush one-sound coming forth from guitars heavy with the sway of chorus and delays, analog synth sounds as though from previous incarnations, and solid grooves
but I really felt like they left me hanging there. They built up the sound, they added in the grooves, and then they were content to leave it at that. It never quite resolved nor did it achieve some kind of conflict. It just hung there in the night sky until they stopped playing. They did have one excellent song [I tried all of the songs they have up for download and while decent, none of them are the "great one" but here's an mp3 for ya] and, again, the whole concert was very easy to listen to and even get lost in but it just didn't quite have the force to distinguish it as something that will really make an impact.

The headliners, our friends The Capes, really do want to be our friends. They are way too dorky looking to really make it in the British scene. I think I would actually describe them much more as Bloc Party meets surf rock. I really got a lot of that Weezer (in a good, Don't Call Me Jonah, way) feeling from their show and the simple yet big bass lines and the very simple keyboard melodies that flesh out a lot of their songs. They have two guitars, a bass, keyboards, and drum. Pinko shoulda gone because he would've loved the bass player's shirt (mystery revealed when I can upload pics). They were a lot of fun and I felt a little embarrassed because the band was rockin' more than the crowd. I really need a crew for these things because I feel contractually obligated to rock out and that does not seem to be the norm for SF indie kids. However, they did a good job and it was a fun show.

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Never Should Have Let Me In

A poem from my early days as a depressed mule. Or donkey. Whatever.

Ode to a chicken patty sandwich

Oh, chicken patty sandwich,
I long for your sweet presence.
You are the wondrous light
in my dreary, studious existence.
I merely plod along concrete trails,
while you waltz upon opalescent flatware.

UPDATES (courtesy of Fulsome, since this post is apparently a dumping ground):
1. I need this (until they change the name).
2. Teh needs things.
3. You really can't try tro associate with well-rounded nerds if you don't read Dinosaur Comics.

Monday, March 06, 2006

Monday Musicalness

Last night I dreamt I was building a Tennessee flat top box. This is the title of a Johnny Cash song on one of the albums I have been listening to a lot recently. I don't know what a flat top box is or how one would play it, but I have heard that the Tennessee variety is particularly flat. And topped. And very box-like. regardless, I was building one and that song was playing over and over in my dreamtime. I may need to cut out the Cash for a little while. No, nevermind. I won't do it. Wouldn't be prudent. Stay the course.

Sunday, March 05, 2006

Cause Chuckles Brought It Up

Although I hardly find it worth watching anymore, someone always tells me that there is one funny sketch on SNL that I should have watched ...

Luckily for us there's so you don't have to watch the other crap. The latest sketch is below. Enjoy.

UPDATE: Old link no longer works (try here, better quality+Quicktime)

Friday, March 03, 2006

Everybody has probably already heard of this guy, but I am a noob. Anyway, I thought it was sorta funny in a heh enh-sigh kind of way. I am not really sure it is funny at all. I am in a blase moi mood today.

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Apple Hates Me

Uh oh, there seems to be a serious problem. I haven't complained about anything in a while! Well, we are going to rectify that situation NOW.

Anyway, Apple doesn't really hate me (at least not any more than they hate everyone). I was recently browsing music on the iTunes music store. Sure, people who are true audiophiles will laugh and snicker at me for thinking about purchasing music that is encoded in a lossy format for the too-high price of $0.99 a track.

And I would agree with them, except that for me to purchase songs actually costs nothing! At least it used to. Back in March of last year, I test drove an Audi A3 (because I love Audi's!) but also because they were having a deal where if you test drove it, you would get 33 free iTunes songs.

So I headed into the dealer, did my test drive (it was nice, way better than my '99 Mustang), and got my free songs.

I didn't want to squander then on buying entire albums (because albums are only $9.99 anyway, so to buy an entire album would be to waste 2-4 songs vs. the actual cost) but I didn't want to just download random songs. So I judiciously waited until I thought of a song I really wanted, or there was a new single that I really wanted but the CD wouldn't be coming out for another month or something.

And things were going well, I kept adding more songs to my collection at an unremarkable but enjoyable pace.

So when I was listening to the internet radio last week and heard an enjoyable new Strokes song, Heart in a Cage, I thought, I have to get this off iTunes. So I went on iTunes, added the song to my cart and went to check out. Hmm, I thought, the little box that says how many free songs I have is gone ... oh well, that's probably because I just upgraded my iTunes recently. So I click purchase.

After the download starts though, I begin to get suspicious. I investigate and I can see that on my credit card, which I had just paid, I have a single pending charge of $1. Now, when I first signed up for iTunes, they didn't require a credit card and I was happy because there was no way I could accidentally buy something that I didn't want.

However, a couple weeks ago my girlfriend missed an episode of NBC's The Office (and my TiVo was on its holiday). So, I thought, I'll be nice, spend $2 on iTunes and gift it to her. She got the episode and was happy but now those nefarious Apple people had my credit card information!

Fast forward back to earlier this week, and now my worst fear had come to life. I'd just paid actual cash money for a crappy lossy encoded song on a CD I'd probably eventually buy anyway.

So getting all pissed, I went to the support website and sent them the wonderful message shown below:
Hey, I just noticed that my free songs disappeared and I accidentally purchased a song not knowing that.  I lost 13 free songs because of this.

It really would have been nice if you had sent an email telling me that my free song codes were going to expire.

As it is I'm annoyed enough now that I probably won't buy another track online anytime in the near future.


Mr. EATnachos
Then, 3 days later I get this awesome reply:

Dear Mr. EATnachos,

Promotional codes issued for Audi's Test Drive promotion expired on
01/01/06. Please contact Audi for further details.

Your credit is updated in iTunes every time you sign in to the
iTunes Music Store. If you haven't signed in to the iTunes Music
Store recently, your credit may display an outdated number. To
sign in and display your current credit amount:

1. Sign in to the iTunes Music Store. If you're not sure how to sign
in to the iTunes Music Store, click this link: itms://

The iTunes application will launch and ask you to sign in.

2. Your updated credit amount will appear in the upper-right hand
corner next to your account name. Be sure to sign in to the Music
Store on a regular basis to update your credit amount, since your
credits may have expired.


Annoying Apple Robotron 5000 Email Responding Monkey XXX Pro
This email has only pissed me off more. Do you think I'm retarded and don't know how to log into a service? You guys are jackasses! I'm pissed because even though you clearly have an expiration date for these free songs (something that I would only be aware of on the rules of some contest form in tiny print) you couldn't send me an e-mail to tell me they were going to expire. Instead they just poof and disappear.

And instead of responding to my complaint about lack of notification, you think I don't know how to log in. I clearly told you that I was mad because I accidentally paid money for a song. To buy a song I would have had to log in so it's not that I don't know how to do that.

Anyway, this is almost enough to convince me to just put a credit card I don't like into the credit card info field and then cancel it just so that they have crap info for me and I won't ever accidentally by their BS compressed music. Put it up in Lossless format and I'd buy the crap out of it!!! But that's another rant ...

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Neal Stephenson Totally Right

I want to get a body armor speedo!

First Ever WRN Prize Pack

I have these tickets. OK, it turns out you probably can't read them but they are for The Capes who play tonight at the Independent. I still want to go but hate to have to give the ticket to a stranger. If anybody around these here parts wants to go, just say so. One ticket is yours free of charge. See how easy this is?

Oh, and here's some info about them
Most press on the Capes has relied heavily on comparisons to Bloc Party, but these parallels are misleading; both bands may be throwbacks to bygone genres, but the Capes lean heavily on the synths to produce bright and bouncy tunes—embodied best in the wonderful "Tightly Wound." Hello is so full of chipper melodies and electronic blips that there are few songs on the band's first LP that don't warrant a head bop or two, though the more impassioned tracks, such as "Comet Tails" and "Gimme," show the band successfully reaching beyond the one-dimensional confines of today's pop.
'Hello' album review - CMJ

Let me know.

UPDATE and clarify: I still want to go. Looking for a "+1" who gets a free ticket. Don't make me use craigslist...