The [Ninja Turtles] henchmen Bebop and Rocksteady have hijacked the musical genres for us just like the Lone Ranger hijacked the William Tell Overture for our parents.

- xkcd

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Apple Hates Me

Uh oh, there seems to be a serious problem. I haven't complained about anything in a while! Well, we are going to rectify that situation NOW.

Anyway, Apple doesn't really hate me (at least not any more than they hate everyone). I was recently browsing music on the iTunes music store. Sure, people who are true audiophiles will laugh and snicker at me for thinking about purchasing music that is encoded in a lossy format for the too-high price of $0.99 a track.

And I would agree with them, except that for me to purchase songs actually costs nothing! At least it used to. Back in March of last year, I test drove an Audi A3 (because I love Audi's!) but also because they were having a deal where if you test drove it, you would get 33 free iTunes songs.

So I headed into the dealer, did my test drive (it was nice, way better than my '99 Mustang), and got my free songs.

I didn't want to squander then on buying entire albums (because albums are only $9.99 anyway, so to buy an entire album would be to waste 2-4 songs vs. the actual cost) but I didn't want to just download random songs. So I judiciously waited until I thought of a song I really wanted, or there was a new single that I really wanted but the CD wouldn't be coming out for another month or something.

And things were going well, I kept adding more songs to my collection at an unremarkable but enjoyable pace.

So when I was listening to the internet radio last week and heard an enjoyable new Strokes song, Heart in a Cage, I thought, I have to get this off iTunes. So I went on iTunes, added the song to my cart and went to check out. Hmm, I thought, the little box that says how many free songs I have is gone ... oh well, that's probably because I just upgraded my iTunes recently. So I click purchase.

After the download starts though, I begin to get suspicious. I investigate and I can see that on my credit card, which I had just paid, I have a single pending charge of $1. Now, when I first signed up for iTunes, they didn't require a credit card and I was happy because there was no way I could accidentally buy something that I didn't want.

However, a couple weeks ago my girlfriend missed an episode of NBC's The Office (and my TiVo was on its holiday). So, I thought, I'll be nice, spend $2 on iTunes and gift it to her. She got the episode and was happy but now those nefarious Apple people had my credit card information!

Fast forward back to earlier this week, and now my worst fear had come to life. I'd just paid actual cash money for a crappy lossy encoded song on a CD I'd probably eventually buy anyway.

So getting all pissed, I went to the support website and sent them the wonderful message shown below:
Hey, I just noticed that my free songs disappeared and I accidentally purchased a song not knowing that.  I lost 13 free songs because of this.

It really would have been nice if you had sent an email telling me that my free song codes were going to expire.

As it is I'm annoyed enough now that I probably won't buy another track online anytime in the near future.


Mr. EATnachos
Then, 3 days later I get this awesome reply:

Dear Mr. EATnachos,

Promotional codes issued for Audi's Test Drive promotion expired on
01/01/06. Please contact Audi for further details.

Your credit is updated in iTunes every time you sign in to the
iTunes Music Store. If you haven't signed in to the iTunes Music
Store recently, your credit may display an outdated number. To
sign in and display your current credit amount:

1. Sign in to the iTunes Music Store. If you're not sure how to sign
in to the iTunes Music Store, click this link: itms://

The iTunes application will launch and ask you to sign in.

2. Your updated credit amount will appear in the upper-right hand
corner next to your account name. Be sure to sign in to the Music
Store on a regular basis to update your credit amount, since your
credits may have expired.


Annoying Apple Robotron 5000 Email Responding Monkey XXX Pro
This email has only pissed me off more. Do you think I'm retarded and don't know how to log into a service? You guys are jackasses! I'm pissed because even though you clearly have an expiration date for these free songs (something that I would only be aware of on the rules of some contest form in tiny print) you couldn't send me an e-mail to tell me they were going to expire. Instead they just poof and disappear.

And instead of responding to my complaint about lack of notification, you think I don't know how to log in. I clearly told you that I was mad because I accidentally paid money for a song. To buy a song I would have had to log in so it's not that I don't know how to do that.

Anyway, this is almost enough to convince me to just put a credit card I don't like into the credit card info field and then cancel it just so that they have crap info for me and I won't ever accidentally by their BS compressed music. Put it up in Lossless format and I'd buy the crap out of it!!! But that's another rant ...


At 3/02/2006 1:10 PM, Blogger fulsome said...

They are bastards. Check out this helpful notification from MLB when I think I gave them a CC # for my free trial. Now I have to wade through the cancellation process:

Your subscription has more live baseball than ever before, including live Spring Training and World Baseball Classic games. From March 3-20, tune in as 16 teams from 16 countries compete for the championship. To access games, go to and use your user name and password to log in to enjoy this international event.

There is no action required to continue your subscription. The credit card you have on file with us will be automatically billed beginning in mid-March. If you have any questions about your subscription, please e-mail Customer Service at

At 3/02/2006 1:18 PM, Blogger Adorable Girlfriend said...

Test driving a Nazi Audi mobile? For shame, Nacho Dude!

At 3/02/2006 1:37 PM, Blogger dontEATnachos said...

Oh, not only test driving, I'd totally buy one if I had the money.

At 3/02/2006 4:14 PM, Blogger teh l4m3 said...

Kazaa, bitchez!

At 3/02/2006 5:10 PM, Blogger fulsome said...

AG: Is there a non-evil car company? I am also in search of a non-evil gasoline supplier.

I don't believe they exist.

At 3/02/2006 6:06 PM, Blogger mdhatter said...

they should have given you a free download.

last x-mas I put up a stink and got a free poster at I used it to send a customer service themed motivational poster to the terrible customer service rep who had lied to me on the phone. To their credit, a few days later the actual poster I had originally ordered arrived via overninght fedex.

I usually just borrow myfriends CD's or just buy them myself. Try newburycomics dot com.

At 3/02/2006 6:07 PM, Blogger mdhatter said...

fulsome. Citgo is owned by the Venezualan gov't. Every gallon is a finger in a republican's eye.

At 3/02/2006 9:16 PM, Anonymous almostinfamous said...

pay by the MB. whole albums cost barely 3-4 bucks.

and you can get a lot of them in lossless.

i hope your bank account dwindles like mine did

At 3/02/2006 9:18 PM, Anonymous almostinfamous said...

oh and this way you pay their legal fees when they start fighting the RIAA

At 3/03/2006 7:04 AM, Blogger Chuckles said...

I have a few non-evil transportation companies for you, fulsome. And for anybody else out there.


In case you don't get it, these are bicycle companies.

At 3/03/2006 7:05 AM, Blogger Chuckles said...

Oh and, Hugo Chavez may be funn and cool right now, but that doesn't mean that he is our savior. He is a little of this and a little of that.

But still way cooler and better than Bush.

At 3/03/2006 8:48 AM, Blogger dontEATnachos said...

How is Schwinn not evil? They closed down all their domestic factories, put all the Schwinn stores out of business and screwed all their former workers. All in the past 30 years!

That's almost as bad as Radio Flyer.

At 3/03/2006 9:41 AM, Blogger Adorable Girlfriend said...

Trek is evil too! It's in bed with the anti semitic VW!

How can you buy a Nazi car? How can you support an organization that aided killing 6 million of my people? How hard is it for you to support US labor organizations and buy a car that is not German? Furthermore, you live in an urban area, you don't need a car!

Chuckles, you have my permission to smack Nacho for such an insult to AG. Nacho will NEVER be permitted to date or flirt with the AG. No way. No how. Not even a quick slap and tickle fest.

At 3/03/2006 1:03 PM, Blogger dontEATnachos said...

dude, I don't flirt. It's a rule.

And how can you be anti-veedub group?

Allow me to explain, their former CEO was kicked out of the company for hiring prostitutes to bribe german labor officials. How awesome is that? It's a rhetorical question but I'll still answer it, REALLY awesome.

Also, Japanese auto makers helped Japan massacre the Chinese so they're no better. And American auto companies are just ridiculously dumb.

At 3/03/2006 10:50 PM, Anonymous almostinfamous said...

i have to agree with fulsome up above. the entire petro-auto industry is filled with scumbags

hello...henry ford? and can't buy a chrysler/dodge/jeep cause hitler drove around in 'em(daimler chrysler).

GM would have been a moderately more respectable company if they didn't make shitty ass cars.

in business and especially Big Business, consolidation just means you get to spread the blood on your hands around.

At 3/04/2006 9:47 PM, Blogger Chuckles said...

Yeah, um, I totally don't know a damn thing about any of bicycle companies anywhere. I was just trying to be a smartass and it bit me in the ass.


So, yeah.

Oh and the Natalie Portman rap just played on SNL and that was awesome. She looks hot when she...does anything. Anything at all.

At 3/05/2006 9:00 AM, Blogger Chuckles said...

Anyone else notice that Steve Jobs is driving the truck?


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