The [Ninja Turtles] henchmen Bebop and Rocksteady have hijacked the musical genres for us just like the Lone Ranger hijacked the William Tell Overture for our parents.

- xkcd

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Delicious or Disgusting: the mighty weiner schnitzel

Forsooth, I speak of Weiner Schnitzel. First of all consider the color scheme of this brazen, glorious roadside monstrosity.

I know there are weighty matters afoot and the relative merits of flightless birds hovers over us anxiously but there are times we have to put those matters aside and consider the meat of the situation. I have discovered an entity that clearly will be of interest to our chosen few. The clan of pork purveyors and the great quest for understanding suburbia and exurbia or whatever burb you may belong to in this lifetime. I presume some of you may already have opinions on this fine establishment as they claim to have 340(!) locations in the US and Guam. Don't forget Guam!

Clearly, this restaurant understands our needs as well. Consider this tasty zen koan:

However, this situation is slightly compromised. Situation: I order a hot dog with kraut -- it comes without ketchup which is surely a less than ideal outcome. I give them a second try, I order the "1/3 lb. BBQ Bacon BIG Dawg." It is clearly from a better, though still not ideal, meat source and it comes wit hBBQ sauce, bacon, and onion rings. It is filling! The gods of takeout food have spoken. It is good.


At 5/24/2006 1:05 AM, Anonymous Pinko Punko said...

Wienerschnitzel is the bomb, especially when you need a quick corn dog, drive-thru style. As opposed to Hot Dog on A Stick which is always buring somewhere in a mall.

I would like to point out that you spelled it wrong. But I know you were being ironic.

At 5/24/2006 5:58 AM, Anonymous Adorable Girlfriend said...

Who calls anything the "bomb" anymore? That is so 1999! These blog commenters are so unhip and tragic.

At 5/24/2006 5:59 AM, Blogger Chuckles said...

This is an unholy abomination of the Austrian culture. I demand satisfaction for this insult! I will lead the lightning attack on the Wienerschnitzel Headquarters myself!



At 5/24/2006 10:50 AM, Blogger fulsome said...

Thanks, AG. One can only wish we had tragically hip blog commenters.

Also, Chuckles - your literal translation of blitzkrieg doesn't work so well. No one makes a lightning attack unless they're a D&D mage...oh, wait...

At 5/24/2006 11:34 AM, Blogger Chuckles said...

I have multiple levels in wizardy classes and posses a intelligence bonus of +7.

I also have two rings of +13 wizardy bonus spells.

At 5/24/2006 4:25 PM, Blogger fulsome said...

The old "which is sadder" routine, eh. Your boast or my understanding of said boast. (random grammar Q, what is the a grammatically correct way to express that sentiment)

Nah, this one is easy: your boast

At 5/25/2006 6:02 AM, Blogger Chuckles said...

I can take this whole situation as low as is inhumanly possible.

I also posses four levels in fighter which qualify me for weapon specialization: blogstick and allow me to earn levels in the prestige class: mystic ninja catwarrior of the ninterwebs.

Ninterwebs: the secret shadow internets of the ninja societies.

At 5/26/2006 12:43 PM, Anonymous Res Publica said...

Well shit, *I* want to be on the ninterwebs!

Also, Weiner Schnitzel = barftacular. That's where I eat on like the day before payday at the end of a 31-day month when the 15th fell on a Sunday, so my last paycheck was actually on the 13th, when I'm not just regular work-for-a-non-profit poor, but REALLY poor. Like PIZOOR. And nothing makes me feel more like a poor person than the profound, soul-crushing sadness that is a meal from Weiner Schnitzel.

At 5/26/2006 4:48 PM, Blogger pop renaissance said...

WEINER SHITZEL, more like.

At 5/27/2006 5:14 AM, Anonymous Adorable Girlfriend said...

well, well... look who finally showed up! Mr. Pop Star. Unfreakingbelievable!


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