The [Ninja Turtles] henchmen Bebop and Rocksteady have hijacked the musical genres for us just like the Lone Ranger hijacked the William Tell Overture for our parents.

- xkcd

Thursday, December 15, 2005

Days Late and Dollars Short

The 3Bulls have decided to fight back (only about a week late) but the resistance is too feeble to even credit them with the title of "insurgents."

Oh look, I found a picture of a scary man-whore on the internet and I'll pretend it's somebody else. That's so original. I can't even imagine any respectable organization doing that!

Look, I'm not so foolish as to claim I know Yosef's external appearance -- I realize it doesn't matter. However, I believe his internal THYCWOTI status could be physically represented by this:


At first you see the teeth and are worried but then you realize it's just a sneeze. A little more observation reveals him to be a poor lost kitty.


So what happened to him? After all, he used to have a future almost as bright as VBen? Was it the Harvard rejection letter? Dr. Adams got his professorship at UNC-Wilmington? Or some even more dastardly plot by those neo-liberals and their subliminal control of ALL three branches of gov't (yes, even more nefarious now that it would appear they are controlled by God fearing Republicans)?

My current operating theory -- innocent young Yosef was corrupted by that dastardly Pinko Punko.

This one may be too much for those innocent eyes -- so click for the rest

At first, you can't decide what to think: cute or disgusting?



Closer observation reveals the evil intent that lies behind that possibly cute exterior...


So it's easy to understand how poor Yosef got sucked into that web of lies.

In my position as WRN1, self-appointed nerd potentate, we've already offered to settle this mano-a-mano. Yosef, we can even provide an alternate East Coast venue -- you, Chuckles, and Nachos (if he still lives or perhaps even ZombieNacho) split the difference somewhere in VA -- while the rest of us congregate at the base of O'Reilly-approved terrorist target #1, Coit Tower.

Until then, I offer this as a truce...overwhelming amounts of cute that surely require 24 hours before you can be mean again:

12 Comments:

At 12/15/2005 9:21 PM, Blogger Gregor Samsa said...

THYCWOTI has never let cuteness stop him in the past. I don't hold much hope that he'll let it stop him now.

 
At 12/15/2005 9:50 PM, Blogger teh l4m3 said...

Yes I do believe you, fulsome, were identified as a broke-toothed, gay crackwhore furry. Are you? It would be irresponsible not to speculate...

 
At 12/15/2005 11:23 PM, Blogger Pinko Punko said...

Pandas do have a way of immobilising me.

Looks like we are on for New Years- is pr coming in to town? What are we gonna do? GC says she's out, but she wants me to have fun. weird.

 
At 12/16/2005 9:15 AM, Blogger Chuckles said...

PP, I would be freaking out if my wife told me go have fun and that she was going stay home instead. But then again, I am known for going completely overboard, so maybe she'll just get sick of bailing me out of the drunk tank. Which I haven't been to yet, but in Iowa, or some other minor red state, I hear they paint their drunk tanks pink and put glow in the dark stars on the ceiling. I shit you not. I'll post the link soon.

 
At 12/16/2005 9:17 AM, Blogger Chuckles said...

Oh, and PR claims to be out of town while I am in town. That would probably be best for any of you that like your dignity.

I am a No L1M1T SOLD13R! I will destroy all in my quest to consume mass quantities!

 
At 12/16/2005 9:43 AM, Blogger Gregor Samsa said...

Oh Chuckles, that was classic!

 
At 12/16/2005 10:45 AM, Blogger Chuckles said...

Yup. The only thing that comment does is proclaim how completely lame I truly am. I am only really good at trash talking myself. Well that and ranting in obscurity.

 
At 12/16/2005 11:04 AM, Blogger pop renaissance said...

i leave for fort bragg on the 30th and come back on the 2nd. i MAY be able to leave on the 31st, but it's highly unlikely.

 
At 12/16/2005 12:19 PM, Blogger Chuckles said...

Shit dude, fulsome and I are going straight from the airport to some bar...

This is either going to be a real long week, or the shortest.

 
At 12/16/2005 9:20 PM, Blogger Pinko Punko said...

well what is TEH doing? Is he gonna hang with us for two minutes and then head down to the Castro?

 
At 12/17/2005 12:48 PM, Blogger Chuckles said...

What is teh doing?

Maybe he could get us all burgers at Nations or even In and Out. I have enver been to In and Out, although I have heard of the secret menu...

 
At 12/17/2005 6:17 PM, Blogger teh l4m3 said...

What do you mean what am I doing? Is this about pop's mid-January show? Cuz I'm there. Nothing before that, tho'. Still fighting the WAR ON MUTHAFUCKIN' CHRISTMAS!!!

 

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